Facing the Beast
by Hurtbytenderlies
Summary: Butch has done the ultimate injustice; taking away something vitally important to Jessie. Trigger Warning: Main character death, suicide, miscarriage, blood, etc.


**Facing the Beast**

 **Disclaimer:** _I do not own Pokémon or the associated characters._

That face. I can never forget that face. She looked so broken in that moment, but what was I to do? My comfort would do nothing but hurt her. I hated to see her like this; so downtrodden and despaired, so defeated. I watched her with sad eyes as she hugged her partner close to her chest, her tears falling freely, as if he had died from drowning in them. But the wound in his chest said more. She had tried to stop the bleeding to no avail; he had been gone the moment he landed on the ground, the most heartbreaking part was his blank eyes, the name he had on his tongue as he fell.

She screamed his name, as if to call him back from Arceus' arms, but he did not stir.

" _James_! _Please_ wake up! _Please_! I need you! _We_ need you!" She wailed, brushing his periwinkle hair from his face.

His body started to harden and cool then, in the midst of rigor mortis. She had been holding him now, for over two hours, her swollen stomach preventing her from holding him as close as she wanted.

" _Please_ … The baby… What will I do without you, James? _Why_? Why you?" She sobbed, and I saw her hold her abdomen, his blood smearing on her skin.

This was their baby. This was James' life. I had seen him so excited about it when he told Cassidy and I about it. He would have been a great father, even going as far as to run from the very organization he knew would catch up to him.

I looked down at the gun in my hand and I felt sick. I felt a gaze burning into me. Looking up, my eyes misty in regret, I saw nothing but heartbreak in her eyes. What was Jessie without her James? She was all I had ever wanted, and I had pushed her away again. I had tried to make her jealous by finding release with Cassidy, but she had been in love with him then, too.

Once, she had loved me, when we were nothing but Rocket Trainees. She had been my first love. Then he came back. She had tried to love me like before; but her first love had been him, and she never got over him. When he entered the program, he confessed he had only joined to look for her. When they became partners, I knew it was over.

To get back at her, I jumped first at the mission to have their heads. The boss wanted them dead, or enough leverage to keep them quiet. I suppose this had been enough. Her gaze, watery and full of fear was enough to make me sick. _I_ had done this. I had made her fear me.

"Shoot me," She begged, standing and holding her growing belly.

His blood painted her, as I shook my head.

I had not planned on killing her today. I threw the gun to the side, watching her eyes dart down to it, then back to me. She sobbed more, covering her face. Never had I seen her cry. She had always been the strongest one I knew. I had taken from her something sacred, something that was so important to her that she would want to kill not only herself, but her child too.

She sobbed harder, and I noticed her body double over in pain. I was confused, until I saw her holding herself, blood dripping from between her legs.

"It's too early! I can't… I can't…" Her voice cracked.

I wanted to get help, but we were out in the middle of the forest; we wouldn't make it in time. She was so broken then, that I had to look away. I had taken more than expected. Her two partners. Her baby. Next? Herself? I shuddered.

I looked down to see drops. I instantly thought rain, but then I realized there were tears running down my face.

She was on the ground now, lying down on her side, mumbling 'My baby' and looking around blankly. She looked traumatized.

Then, I realized, this was the most fucked thing I had done for the boss. I killed a father. I killed his unborn child, and I broke his wife.

I still think about that day, five years later. Jessie was found dead in a cheap hotel room a month after I killed her husband. No note, no last words to be heard. After I had slain him, she lost her baby, then her sanity. She had gone in a downward spiral. It was all my fault. She must've felt like she was holding up a mountain. I wiped my eyes then. I was a monster, and now I was facing the beast.


End file.
